love

How To Break Up With Someone

Relationships February 24, 2011

At first I thought it was a cruel joke. But now I realize that the Osmonds really are never going to go away. Okay. So in between trying to figure out how I can plan a wedding without losing my mind or offending everyone for life, and then choosing a honeymoon location where I won’t [...]

Valentine’s Day Is About As Cool As Ke$ha

Confessions February 14, 2011

I just had to check in and see how you are surviving the Empire State Building of Lame Holidays thus far? Me? Eh. Let’s see here. What could I possibly say or do that might lift your spirits on such a dreadful day? Oh, I know, I know!!!!! 1. Make a list of things I [...]

41 comments Don’t even act like you’re done reading…. → by Blunt Delivery

Valentine’s Day And Other Unfortunate Realities

Confessions February 10, 2011

Lately, I’ve noticed a lot of visitors, dodging the landmines and trekking over mountainous terrains to stop over at my humble, but well decorated corner of the Internets and rest their weary souls. So before I blindside you with what I have to say, which by all accounts will probably alter the course of your [...]

31 comments Don’t even act like you’re done reading…. → by Blunt Delivery

Blunt Bites: The Boy Who Jumped To Conclusions But Had A Good Singing Voice

Blunt Bites February 6, 2011

[ DISCLAIMER: Blunt Bites break away from my normal, detailed laugh-out-loud (right?) posts. They are like snapshots of a significant part of my life. Sometimes, they're serious. Sometimes, they're funny. But they're always gonna be delicious. Yum. ] I called you one night, out of nowhere. The snow always reminded me of you. At first, you didn’t [...]

29 comments Don’t even act like you’re done reading…. → by Blunt Delivery

Blunt Bites: The Boy Who Smelled Like Garlic

Blunt Bites January 17, 2011

[ Blunt Bites break away from my normal, detailed laugh-out-loud (right?) posts. They are like snapshots of a significant part of my life. Sometimes, they're serious. Sometimes, they're funny. But they're always gonna be delicious. Yum. ] It was 1999. I got let out of the hospital the same day as my Junior year prom, except it was [...]

51 comments Don’t even act like you’re done reading…. → by Blunt Delivery

12 Step Breakup Recovery Program

Relationships October 23, 2010

It’s been twelve days since my last post. Accident? Please. We’re not talking about Denny DelVecchio here. I’m trying to subliminally remind that you that the twelve days of Christmas are just around the corner and it’s in your best interest to put the danish down and put the tree up. Don’t be one of those scrooges that [...]

74 comments Don’t even act like you’re done reading…. → by Blunt Delivery

Boy + Girl + Blogging + Chicago + Frizzy Hair = BlogDate

Relationships September 29, 2010

Listen. I’ve already paused the Roseanne marathon. I’ve canceled my plans to work out with Jo, the unofficial roommate. And I’m trying to set down my caramel apple spice long enough to type this, but considering it tastes like Christmas morning exploded in my mouth, I can’t make any promises. Why am I going to such extremes, you [...]

69 comments Don’t even act like you’re done reading…. → by Blunt Delivery

About As Much As I Love Geraldo Rivera’s Mustache

Confessions June 12, 2010

That girl. The one whose overly pushy, Sicilian boyfriend was able to convince her that entering a beauty pageant, despite the fact she was allergic to hair spray, 4-inch heels, up-dos and beauty pageants, would be a super awesome way to get scholarship money for her overpriced private college education. The one with absolutely no rhythm or hand-eye coordination, who [...]

23 comments Don’t even act like you’re done reading…. → by Blunt Delivery

Marriage: This Is What It Boils Down To

Family Matters June 9, 2010

Dad: I got serious heartburn from that strawberry shortcake. It was the milk. Mom: Milk? I’d blame it on the strawberries. They’re so acidic. Dad: Milk contains lactic acid. Don’t ever forget it. Mom: Well I should buy lactose free milk then. Dad: You did. You were buying that Soy Milk, but then you said it was [...]

27 comments Don’t even act like you’re done reading…. → by Blunt Delivery

An Ode To Park Benches And Passion

Confessions May 6, 2010

“The Greeks didn’t write obituaries. When a man died, they asked only one question: did he have passion?” I help take care of this elderly man named Allen. He can’t remember what happened five minutes ago, but he can give you a play by play of everything that happened during his time in WWII. Sadly, [...]

17 comments Don’t even act like you’re done reading…. → by Blunt Delivery

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