That girl. The one whose overly pushy, Sicilian boyfriend was able to convince her that entering a beauty pageant, despite the fact she was allergic to hair spray, 4-inch heels, up-dos and beauty pageants, would be a super awesome way to get scholarship money for her overpriced private college education. The one with absolutely no rhythm or hand-eye coordination, who was forced to perform [...]
Let me start by saying that I currently drive a plum-colored ‘99 Saturn with duct tape on the hood. The purpose of the duct tape is to cover an actual hole in my hood that was created when I veered into the shoulder and crashed into a road sign, which fell on my car and [...]
I am a stay-at-home, unshowered writer and aspiring author of non-fiction books. During the past 10 years, I attended college in London, traveled the world, and dated a myriad of inappropriate men. Although I have successfully avoided crossing over that shaky, domestic bridge laden with overpriced weddings and screaming babies, I have still acquired a strong appreciation for sweatpants. I enjoy photography and chronicling my ridiculous life on this personal blog, where I also use my friends' lives for a cheap laugh. My biggest fears are mayonnaise and Neil Diamond.
That's sort of what this blog is about. Sort of. But don't hold me to it, or I'll get all claustrophobic.
You are welcomed with open arms and lukewarm sentiment.
