photography

The Universe Is Allergic To Me Turning 29

Confessions June 30, 2011

Every year, without fail, June 25th comes creeping in to steal away another year of my life and inconspicuously plant two more gray hairs that I won’t discover until I’ve just eaten an entire Little Caesars pizza at 10am and I go into the bathroom and notice them under the florescent lights. Oh, just me? Although, [...]

Life Lately In Pictures: Failures Brought To You By My Camera Phone

Confessions June 3, 2011

I had like 7 dreams last night. First, I was shot in the stomach and pulled the bullet out myself, while driving to the hospital. Then, I was being chased through the jungle by kidnappers. Then, I was eating cupcakes in my mom’s kitchen as I watched my dad get assaulted in the backyard. Now [...]

46 comments Don’t even act like you’re done reading…. → by Blunt Delivery

Life Lately In Pictures: Brought To You By My Camera Phone

Confessions May 20, 2011

It started out like any other Wednesday night in my living room. Except my hip had just popped out of joint, and I was sitting across from my friend Jo, who was wearing an eye patch. I’ll address your concerns later. But basically, she chemically burned her eye and my hip always pops out of [...]

48 comments Don’t even act like you’re done reading…. → by Blunt Delivery

Blunt Bites: An Old Italian Guy Named Joe

Blunt Bites March 27, 2011

[ DISCLAIMER: Blunt Bites break away from my normal, detailed laugh-out-loud (right?) posts. They are like snapshots of a significant part of my life. Sometimes, they're serious. Sometimes, they're funny. But they're always gonna be delicious. Yum. ] I met Joe while working at a retirement home and almost instantly, we connected. During my first week of [...]

32 comments Don’t even act like you’re done reading…. → by Blunt Delivery

A Photo Shoot And A Scientific Breakthrough

Confessions March 11, 2011

Alright, Science. Get your gloves on, cause we’re about to box. I know you think you can jack with our diets every other day by releasing new information regarding the detriments of coffee, and eggs and high fructose corn syrup, and yet you conveniently forget to report other pertinent information regarding the mental instability of babies. What gives [...]

43 comments Don’t even act like you’re done reading…. → by Blunt Delivery

This Blog Is The Next Heidi Montag

Confessions March 7, 2011

This blog is so vain. She probably thinks this post is about her. Well, in this instance she is right. You know what they say about plastic surgery: it’s addicting. And if anyone would know, it’s this blog, which has had three different looks in the past year. I told her she had better stop [...]

53 comments Don’t even act like you’re done reading…. → by Blunt Delivery

Valentine’s Day And Other Unfortunate Realities

Confessions February 10, 2011

Lately, I’ve noticed a lot of visitors, dodging the landmines and trekking over mountainous terrains to stop over at my humble, but well decorated corner of the Internets and rest their weary souls. So before I blindside you with what I have to say, which by all accounts will probably alter the course of your [...]

31 comments Don’t even act like you’re done reading…. → by Blunt Delivery

America, This Is How Much I Love Your Beautiful Face

Confessions July 6, 2010

I don’t get it. So you’re saying that when I said I was going to start posting on a Monday/Wednesday/Friday rotation, you thought that meant I was posting a blog every Monday, Wednesday and Friday? Clearly, we have communication issues. And in the interest of breaking free from my passive-aggressive behavior, I will simply tell you [...]

20 comments Don’t even act like you’re done reading…. → by Blunt Delivery

How To Avoid Awkward Encounters On Your Birthday

Confessions June 29, 2010

Question: Why wear the world’s most unflattering, horizontal-striped dress on your birthday? Answer: So that you have something even more upsetting than your birthday to focus on. Another viable reason could be because it slightly entirely resembles The Hamburglar. Cus isn’t that what birthdays kind of are? One giant Hamburglar, sneaking up on you to steal another year? This year has [...]

29 comments Don’t even act like you’re done reading…. → by Blunt Delivery

5 Things Men Do That Annoy The Crap Outta Women

Relationships June 23, 2010

Wait, why are you holding a giant calendar with red X’s all over it? …And why is there a whistle around your neck? Did you recently become a gym teacher? STOP TAPPING YOUR FOOT! What do you mean it’s only been a week and I’ve already broken my promise of posting on Monday, Wednesday and Friday? Well, well, smartypants.. perhaps [...]

27 comments Don’t even act like you’re done reading…. → by Blunt Delivery

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