Browsing all posts tagged under »children«
→ April 29, 2009
There’s something magical that happens the very instant you become a mom. I’m not sure of the details because I have not yet crossed that shakey domestic bridge, but from what I can gather: you become the cheapest person alive.
My very best friend is a new mom. I get in her car and immediately [...]
→ April 23, 2009
It’s no wonder I don’t make any sense. I’m a combination of two polar opposites, who by all rights, should never have met much less married. My mother came from a nazi-strict household where she wasn’t allowed to see movies or go to fooball games, for fear she would encounter Satan himself. She also wasn’t allowed to celebrate Christmas which explains why [...]
→ April 20, 2009
What exactly is it with the Recycle Bin on my desktop? And why is it that everytime I go to empty it, I accidentally delete it? And why is it that when I go to search for it in my computer, it says ‘no results found?’ And why is my computer trying so hard to [...]
→ April 14, 2009
This is a snapshot of my life on any given day. …Piles of unopened mail. …30 different notepads with un-descipherable scribbles of random thougths that I’ve written down when I was supposed to be hanging out with someone. After Easter, the Cadbury chocolate bar could be easily substituted for Reeses or anything but Milk Duds. [...]
→ April 7, 2009
I have a confession to make. But that’s no fun, let’s talk about hair. If I were a hairdresser, I would be my dream client. I’m no expert on the scientific terminology of the salon world, but ”2 inches off the back” seems like a pretty easy $40, plus maybe another $5 tip depending on whether or not I’m [...]
→ March 6, 2009
To say that I was an awkward middle-schooler would be to say that grass is green. Or Obama is the Messiah. Or half of my teeth need fillings.
There were so many things wrong with me that I might actually have been considered “cute.” In an unfortunate kind of way, of course.
My parents always did [...]
→ February 26, 2009
Throughout the ages, many philosophers have attempted to answer the question, “Why would I rather be tied up in a glass box and left for dead in the Sahari desert than go to the Dentist?”
For me, it started when I was six. It’s bad enough that I inherited my mother’s unbelievably awful teeth, and I always had an average of three cavities EVERY visit [...]
→ February 25, 2009
I was thinking that we would touch the subject of commitments and fears and all sorts of deep rooted feelings that surface on a late saturday night. Sound fun? Ok, let’s get right to it: I have serious problems with committment. Hmm. Well, I know I just said I was going to talk about that but [...]
→ February 24, 2009
One of my goals for 2009 was to “stop fabricating the truth” so that means that what you are about to witness is definitely legit.
My family is hilarious. We’re like the token Italian family they always showcase in movies, who talk over eachother and have 8 different conversations happening at once. Except, my mom [...]
→ February 22, 2009
The problem with me is I had a great childhood.
This is a bittersweet fact of my life, as now I have nothing to blame my issues on. My mom wasn’t a career obsessed, impossible to please crazypants, who tried to force me into childhood beauty pageants and acting classes so that she could live [...]
→ February 21, 2009
My entrepreneural spirit and business savvy disposition began at an extremely young age. Younger than most.
I remember waking up at 5 am., walking over to my neighbor’s house, and telling him that he needed to get his butt in gear and come help me make the cranberry juice. (neither of our moms ever had [...]