I Attract Crazy People: Case Study #548

I’m not one of those people who tries to collect Facebook friends [or as my dad calls it: FaceSpace]. Those people have deep-rooted acceptance issues stemming from childhood. That is my educated guess based on the two psychology classes I took at community college.

This young man from London sent me a friend request, which I ignored, of course. I’m particularly leery of Londoners, given my extensive experience with a certain British creeptown. But we really don’t have time for that this week. A couple hours later, I noticed a message from the guy. I have so conveniently preserved the conversation for you to analyze.


Mind you, I thought this would be an appropriate time to stop responding as it sounded like we were on the same page: I’m not from the “tele” or a model or a singer = no further point to continue this conversation.

Just kidding! It’s Opposite Day!

He started a new message thread:


And now that I’ve posted this on my blog, I’m quite sure I’ve only sealed my fate. But I couldn’t help myself. You guys deserve to know the real reason why I came up missing. And while you’re mourning my absence, you can check out the other half of my creepy, abandoned house pictures.

They may, afterall, be the last ones I ever take.

It was nice knowing you.



34 thoughts on “I Attract Crazy People: Case Study #548

  1. Holy shit. What a creep!! I just had a random guy add me too. He goes to my university, but I’ve never seen or talked to him before… weird.

    Beautiful pictures. The last one is pretty scary.

  2. Yikes. You can come hide out at my place if you want. My kids are gone for the next 1.5 weeks, so there’s lots of room. And creeper will probably think you’re living in an igloo or something, seeing as I’m in Canada, so he’ll forget about you asap and move on.

  3. Oh goodness. And I thought I didn’t want to join Facebook because I didn’t feel like people whom I’ve actually met and decided no longer to speak to. never even considered the wack-jobs that I might have yet to meet. . . Yeah, good luck with all that. And stay out of creepy houses from now on. Y’know, JUUUUUUUST in case.

  4. Given your erratic posting schedules…no one here really would know if you went missing.

    How the heck does someone randomly find you on Facebook? This isn’t linkedin people. I only friend people I know.

  5. bahahhahaha its like you have a knack for this. Its almost a talent you could compete on shows like.. So You Think You Can Attrack Weirdoes or The Creep-dude Attractor Factor… or American’s That Have Talent for Attracting Freaks…

    well you can always come downunder, we’ll hide ya haha

    pls post soon so we know you are OK

  6. bear – i wanted to respond to you first before you FREAKED OUT!@$% anyway, i have no earthly idea how this guy from across the ocean found me. none.

    susi- i’m still alive. as of today. which is good cus i have a family pool party. good chance to say goodbye!

    me – i cannot make a promise i can’t keep. but next time i venture into the creeptown house i will have a whole entourage.

    mary – hey! missed you around these parts.

    taylor – yea. me = creeped out. both by the house and the guy.

  7. I confess, I randomly add folk in my area mainly for networking purposes. (business related)any true friendships other than acquaintances that come of it are icing on the cake. I occasionally get requests too. Nothing untypical than other folks networking, an occasional fake profile from a hot looking pic that states that it (she) just took some pics too steamy to show on FB view here @ http://idontreallygivearatsbackside.XXX.

    This post is reminisce of the days when I messed around on Yahoo chat :)) some of the stories I witnessed and can tell you from that…dudes masquerading as dudettes, many perverts, Filipinas ‘falling’ in love with you on a whim (some really nice gals,but, I truly questioned the motive, Various other folk (nationalities) trying to get you to sponsor them to come here, hundreds asking for money…just to name a few.

    Tell it like it is an Rock On! No worries ’bout me cuzz you scare the living daylights outta me 😉

    Oh yes, FaceBook does come up with some weird friend suggestions at time

  8. …ummmmmm, I may be too late—and I realize you don’t know me—but can you put me down in that will of yours for future ownership of those socks you’re wearing up there? Thanks…

    As far as that scrawny blanched web-stalker is concerned—you don’t need to fear anyone that answers to a queen—oh snap 🙂


  9. I get random messages sometimes too. I usually ignore them.

    Facebook turns us ALL into stalkers, yes, but some people…let’s just say they get the GOLD STAR in Stalking. Facebook actually *trains* them. It’s like boot camp for weirdos.

    But hey, without it, how could I look at random people’s pictures all day?

  10. Why didn’t you f**k with him more??? This poor man is ripe for mind games, all to be played up for our amusement on B.D. Suggestion: invite him to visit you, then the day before he comes write him and say you got married on a whim the night before.

  11. Tell him you’re in the Nigerian Transatlantic Banking business and all he has to do is deposit $5k in an offshore account and you’ll send him eleventy billion dollars. I can’t believe no one has thought of this scam yet!

    • kate – you are welcomed with open arms and lukewarm sentiment. and that goes for me and all my readers! thanks for stopping by!

      susi – ssssiiiiigh. i know there’s nothing i can say. and u know that we’ve all been there. wish you lived here – chicago is pretty awesome! think about it 😉

  12. You’re getting all of these random Facebook requests, Brit, because you’re now famous as well as awesome! Seriously, though, I imagine it’s more difficult for females to just add guys they don’t know than it is for guys to add strange females. It would be our dream for some lass to stalk our page trying to get to know us. For the ladies, it’s just plain creepy.

    I tell my wife to be mindful of the strays who just want to be her “friend”. You never know how many tidbits of information a weirdo can put together to actually find you. So be careful, and if you ever come up missing, I will personally draw your picture on all of the ensuing milk cartons. 🙂

  13. Whoa! Talk about randomness. Isn’t it creepy how people find you on Facebook and think you’d want to be their friend even though you’ve never had any association with them? Had that happen when I put up a new snowboarding pic as my profile pic. All of the sudden all these random guys were friending me and trying to start conversations. Your’s was definitely more CREEPY!

  14. More cement for my stone as to why I don’t want to be on face book anymore.

    Why do all these weirdos want to be our friends? WE could be the creepy ones, but I suppose if the person requesting the friendship is already creepy it’s a match made in heaven.

    And to think- I was just getting to know you….(that’s not nice, i’m sorry).

  15. Pingback: Blunt Delivery

  16. Thin line between stalking and courtship, ladies. Me thinks George Clooney could be hiding in your bushes at 3 o’clock in the morning wearing nothing but ass chaps, and you all would be like, “That’s so romantic!”


Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published.