Lately, I’ve received alot of questions to the effect of “how do I find the one?” Well, it just so happens that I have more than a few answers up my very svelte sleeve. I’ve spent weeks, possibly even months [if I were to have logged all my time] researching and compiling data for what I am about reveal to you. As per usual, you can expect to pay not a single PENNY for the knowledge that I am about to impart upon you! It is but merely the beginning of a lifetime of benefits that you will reap by reading this blog. How shall I be compensated, you ask? The smile on your face.
For many of you, it’s not that you’re unlucky, you’re just looking in all the wrong places. As you can imagine, I’m going to break the disturbing news to you right now. You’re never going to find creme brulee on the Taco Bell menu, and unfortunately, you never will [because it would be awesome to be able to get a Chalupa and creme brulee all in one stop]. I will further demonstrate my point in the following chart. Please study it with ravenous desire. memorize it. picture it. dream about it at night. frame it on your wall. tape it to your fridge. fold it up into a teeny tiny piece and carry it next to your heart… for contained therein you will find the answer to one of life’s most perplexing questions.
Now, if you look carefully, you will observe that you have equal chances of meeting your future mate in: rehab, space camp, a safari, solitary confinement, or your mailbox. But now I want you all to take out your microscopes because we’re going to delve into this and chizzle away to find out how this affects your dating life. With closer analyzation, you will discover that you actually have a greater chance of meeting your future mate in solitary confinement, than you do at the bar.